It's Broke, now what?

 

This is by far the most difficult of the posts I've written. I will have to decide first of all what to say, then the proper way to say it. The year is 1986, the bike is the 1985 Husqvarna 250CR, no new bike this year. These posts are about motorcycles, but most of all they are about life. Life was producing challenging things that were far more weighty than a new motorcycle. Whatever your thing is, life will happen to you too. It is easy for us to confuse important things with non-important, to have the distraction of the non-important obscuring the sight of the important without us realizing it. Is a new motorcycle important? It seems to be, we spend thousands of our hard-earned dollars to purchase one. Is winning a race or finishing well in any athletic competition important? It seems to be, we spend endless hours conditioning ourselves and practicing being able to do so.

What about a strong marriage, strong family, healthy home in which to raise our children? It seems we think those things are just a given, do they require the thousands of dollars of investment and endless hours of conditioning and practice? Just asking? Of course, you cannot purchase a strong marriage with money or secure a successful home for a family with a practice schedule, but the one does reveal the focus of the mind against the other. 

The purchase of a new bike ranks far more than fun.  Winning an athletic event or sport is exhilarating! However, divorce is devastating on so many levels, all other accomplishments pale in comparison. It is amazing how high we esteem our personal success when it applies to business or sports, even when they are local or amateur. It is also amazing how quickly they fall from their esteemed position when something truly important in life is lost.

In 1986, I qualified for the Loretta Lynn's Amateur Motocross Nationals. This was a big deal for me, something I thought was an accomplishment. So much so I still have memorabilia to that year hanging on my wall. To see the results posted to the left click on the results tab here: 1986 Results However, it was that same year I realized my home and family were coming apart, by the end of the year all would be lost, the stamp of divorce would forever mark that year. 

What can be said? A young couple who swore to love each other till death do them part, determined they could no longer. A 6-year-old boy would somehow have to understand why and how this could be. For reasons, he couldn't possibly understand, he would lose the home of security he trusted and find himself adjusting to back and forth visitations between Mom and Dad. Instead of affection, he hears harsh words exchanged between Mom and Dad. Extended family and friends are grieved with all the hurt and lose that has occurred. It is now you realize the numbers recorded in the results and all the effort required to obtain them are nothing. At the moment, nothing is important but what has been lost. A young marriage is a wonderful thing, it is a God given treasure, but like all other things it needs to be committed to Christ. That is not a complicated thing to do, just something that is easy not to do. Things do not unravel in a day, it is like a piece of neglected metal that slowly begins to rust until it becomes unusable. Committing a marriage to the Lord is simply a setting of all things in service to him. It is only as we grow in grace as a couple will our marriage grow in strength. Do non-Christian marriages survive? Sure, but they simply cannot do so with the assurance or the grace that is received in a marriage committed to the Lord. 

I remember one sobering moment, looking over at the driver's seat while driving down the road and realizing I was alone. It left a gapping hole that I could literally feel, it was a real physical pain.  The next few months would be a dangerous time. When you are faced with such circumstances, you don't think normally. Decisions can be made that will be detrimental to you later on, or even add to the issues you already have. It is a time to be careful and give yourself time to heal. However, most of the time we don't do that, we just react to the hurt trying to find a way to make it go away. This is the case for all sides involved. 

Why am I telling you this? Because I want you to know these things without living them. To be able to focus on life as it should be, and live to your fullest for the Glory of God. I realize today, speaking of serving the Lord or living for the Glory of God seems cliché. Most people today are still religious, they are just religious on their own terms, walking in their own morality, they may have Jesus, but it is a Jesus they can agree with, not the one you actually find in the Scriptures. One is shamed if they dare to judge them in those views. 

There is a reality to true faith, one that delights in the truth that is found in the Scriptures. When looking through true faith, the reality of the world becomes much clearer. It doesn't help you from avoiding hurt, failure, or even a failed marriage. It doesn't always save your children and assure you they will survive a fallen world. However, in the midst of all these things, you can see the world in its reality and navigate your path accordingly. What does this look like when lived out practically? It's just simply what one does in everyday life. For instance, today, it is becoming popular for a young couple to move in together. It does seem reasonable, it allows you to try out a relationship without the demands of legal commitment. It provides financial incentive. If things go south, the decision to separate in theory should be as easy as the decision to come together. If it does work out, you can always decide to get married in the future and do so with more assurance. 

What is the reality? Moving in together reveals nothing about a person that cannot be discovered outside that practice. What it does is diminish the intimacy that is revealed only in the marriage bed. It diminishes the commitment to trust that is left hanging loose in the loose arrangement. The financial incentive is a hoax, all that is needed can be obtained while waiting for marriage. But what if things goes south? Waiting till marriage does not guarantee it won't, in reality sometimes things simply happen anyway. However, marriage is built on a stronger foundation and is able to stand much greater stress because it is rooted in commitment. The dissolving of a "move in" situation can be even more financially damaging because you have less recourse in law, and the emotional loss is just as devastating.

That is reality, however, deciding to wait until marriage to enjoy the pleasures and joys afforded to young couples does not make you a Christian nor is it in itself a committing of one's marriage to the Lord. In years past, society in general honored the marriage contract because the culture deemed "shacking up" unacceptable, it spoke something of one's character. Honoring the marriage contract is simply something you do when you are already committed to the Lord. (Heb 13:4, Marriage is to be held in honor among all, and the marriage bed is to be undefiled, for the sexually immoral and adulterers God will judge.) 

Maybe this sounds too preachy, but the reality is we do what we do, either because we love ourselves or because we love God. Sometimes we do the right thing, but the right thing can be done out of love for ourselves and not for the glory of God.  

In all that we do in work, play, and relationships, if one is a Christian, they will be rubbing against the grain. Doing what is acceptable in a fallen culture, and living as those of the world do, is not a mark of a true Christian. It is popular in today's Christian philosophy to believe God want's the best in life for his people. The reality is, this life and this world is fallen and sinful, the only response we can have toward God is have mercy on me a sinner. 

Luke 18:

    10, Two men went up into the temple to pray; the one a Pharisee, and the other a publican. 
    11, The Pharisee stood and prayed thus with himself, God, I thank thee, that I am not as the rest of men, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even as this publican. 
    12, I fast twice in the week; I give tithes of all that I get. 
    13, But the publican, standing afar off, would not lift up so much as his eyes unto heaven, but smote his breast, saying, God, be thou merciful to me a sinner. 
    14, I say unto you, This man went down to his house justified rather than the other: for every one that exalteth himself shall be humbled; but he that humbleth himself shall be exalted. 

  

So how do we end this? The reality is life is going to find you in both good and difficult ways. You will have to face it with only your wit and natural abilities, or you can look for grace. Look at the world around you, I bet you see something broken not too far away. 

We come into this world and naturally grow into ourselves. We want to heal our hurts and fix our failures on our own. The reality is, our efforts only distract us at best or trade it for other hurts and failure at worst. I'm not going to tell you that Jesus will fix it, but He will save you, give you hope, strengthen you in the midst of hardships and in the end give you eternal life with Him. Christ didn't die on a cross and rise from the dead to fix all your worldly problems, but He did promise to be with you till the end of the world.  Matthew 28:18, And Jesus came to them and spake unto them, saying, All authority hath been given unto me in heaven and on earth. 
    19, Go ye therefore, and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them into the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit: 
    20, teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I commanded you: and lo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the world. 

I am reminded of Joni Eareckson Tada, at 17 she was out enjoying life, while diving into water with some friends, she hit her head and broke her neck. She has now been paralized for over 50 years living with at times severe pain and being compeletly dependent on others to help her with the simplist things of life. Jesus didn't fix it, but He has been with her every step of the way. In her own words she has stated, "My weakness, that is, my quadriplegia, is my greatest asset because it forces me into the arms of Christ every single morning when I get up." There are quadripleics who have coped without Christ, but those in Christ find great joy in Him in the midst of their quadriplegia. If this kind of joy appeals to you, if you want this kind of strength to live life with, then look to Christ, ask him to turn your heart to love Him. John 14:6, Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, and the truth, and the life: no one cometh unto the Father, but by me.

May God bless each of you,

David